LOVErary

I do Like you. I know its crazy because we haven’t met personally but I always feel like I missed you. Since the very first day we exchanged conversation I know I found other source of my happiness. And the days passed by and I felt like, I couldn’t go on because my feelings goes deeper. Indeed, Im happy. As always. But I woke up one morning and realized it was not healthy having this feelings towards you. Because you made me feel crazy every single day. Crazy in a nice way. I realized it wasn’t me. It wasn’t me that makes you truly happy. It wasn’t me that completes your day. It wasn’t me that you want to talk to if you are having a bad day. It wasn’t me that you are looking for if you are tired. It wasnt me at all. Every day I’m wondering what are you doing? have you eaten? How was your day? Are you tired? But then again I realized I’m not the one who should be doing that. Then I will end up giving myself a deep breath and always convinced myself that It was okay. I tried so many times to stay away but I always finding myself looking back. I know you could remember that since I’ve done that a lot of times. I sought for advice, my friend told me to take a risk. What if there was a chance? But I told her, what if there was NO chance? And she replied back how would I know If I haven’t tried it yet. But still it is killing me. Yes, I’m coward because I don’t want to take a risk. Well I couldn’t take any rejection anymore. I would take a risk if It is worth to do so, If I have assurance that at the end of the battle I know I would win. But unfortunately, I dont have any. Plus we are thousand miles away. I wouldn’t able to do what I have to , if ever. And I know you are happy with your current girl. And thats the most important thing right now. Tho you are a douche, jerk, an ass, dork you are beyond awesome. I couldn’t find a word to express how awesome you are. Stay cool. I will always be your squirrel buddy!:) I want stay being one of your butthole friend. But I have to. How about me? I need to put my pieces back together. I know I will be fine. I know you would think how come my feeling becomes like this, I don’t know either. Even me, I’m questioning myself. I haven’t done any confession in my entire life. So feel free to feel special jerk. So, thanks for all cause. I should put myself together again first. And I dont know how to talk to you after I send this to you. Lol I will miss having an awesome conversation with you tho. :)